The fact that there’s a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.
I know I swear a lot: 1. I’m very sorry, 2. I’ll try to behave, 3. 1 & 2 are lies, 4. you can fuck off.
Drink coffee: do stupid things faster with more energy.
Laughter is the best medicine: unless you have diarrhea.
Autocorrect has yet to figure out how often I swear and how rarely I talk about ducks.
Know your worth — then add taxes.
It’s all shits and giggles. Until someone giggles and shits.